SAHM or WAHM? July 20, 2008

I have recently become a SAHM (stay at home mom), while West coast has done this for over a year, and will post herself later….we are both actually looking at being WAHM’s (work at home mom’s), but finding a legit opportunity seems pretty challenging, let me start by saying I love it, and yes it is harder than any job I have had, and more rewarding than every job I have had.  I have yet to find a better way to balance everything that needs to be done during the day, and carve out a few me minutes in there.  I have a whole new respect for those who do this.

I recently watching Jon & Kate plus 8 (love that show) and was blown away by her efficiency, effectiveness, and have you seen how clean her home is, her children are all happy (not to mention the always look nice (hair done, clothing clean etc) , it looks like she makes good and healthy meals…and I think how the heck does she do this.  I am someone who always dreamed of having a big family, but the reality of it for me is if one or two is a challenge, how do people have 8 or more?

So ladies, are you a SAHM or a WAHM?  We want to hear from you, how you manage it all, and make it work for your family.  If you don’t work, how do you keep costs down?  What activities do you do with your children to keep things fun?

If you do work we want to hear what you do, since we (kat & skye) are both looking into finding something we can do while raising the kids!  More later…..

How do you deal with Momma-criticism? July 15, 2008

 So recently we had an issue with a family member (not my relation, wink-wink) who frequents our house the issue deep down is me taking things too personally, BUT this person wouldn’t quit.  As I went about my daily parenting activities, the person we will call Sally  would offer comments on each and every thing I did I was inundated with the following comments about my 2.5 mo/old:

• How do you know the baby is eating enough if you are nursing?
• Have you thought of giving the baby formula, or sugar water?
• Babies just cry, you are spoiling the baby
• Attachment parenting sounds like a trend to me
• Put the baby down already
• I started my kids on food at 6 weeks, you should too
• Why aren’t you putting the baby in the crib
• that carrier is silly, you should let the baby just lay down and cry, it is good for them
• Co-sleepers will spoil the baby
• Organic food is just a ploy to get you to spend more, look at my family, we are fine.

Just so you know I don’t preach about the above mentioned stuff, they ask me questions and I answer them simply.  This visit they were flipping through my favorite baby book.

I am listening to all this and grinding my teeth, I actually didn’t respond to any of these comments.  I am usually a Pollyanna about things, I don’t always achieve it, but I do believe in the Power of Positive Thinking. I have witnessed the effects of having a negative mindset and a positive one, and the latter is much more appealing.  During this hailstorm of negative comments the baby was crying, a lot which only made the comments more annoying.  

Then Sally’s daughter said, You know what, crack heads have babies and they survive.  I looked up at her and just stared at her in disbelief.  I wanted to yell: Well sorry we have higher standards than crack-heads thank you very much!  What the heck kind of comment is that?  The staring made her really uncomfortable

I don’t do this, even when someone is doing something that goes against my beliefs I shut my mouth.  So I am still steaming about it a week later. 

My confidence wasn’t really shaken when this happened, as much as other times like when I was scolded in public for not covering the baby’s hands with mittens to avoid people passing germs, since people love touching baby hands, when that happened I burst into tears and felt like the worst Momma out there, I have pangs of Momma guilt about a lot of things….

So what do you think, how should I have handled this?  What would you do?  Have you dealt with similar stuff?

Summer fun June 28, 2008

Making memories for our children is so important.  When I look back on my own childhood, summer is connected to a lot of my good memories.  Playing outside with my siblings, cousins and friends in our pool, our house was always the favorite, thanks to my laid back & fun momma.  Homemade popsicles, camp outs in the back yard, swimming at night, chasing fireflies, riding my bike, climbing trees, summer reading club at the library, taking walks with my family, watching some television before bed (Fraggle Rock, or the Muppet show were favorites) fresh from the bath, my long hair dripping down the back of my nightgown, feeling tired in a good way. 

I see too many children today over scheduled during the summer, it is almost like they are still in school.  When I had a career that revolved around children, it saddened me to see that imagination doesn’t seem to play a part with mainstream kids.  If they aren’t doing one of their extracurriculars they are zoning in front of video games, IM, movies, and television.  Of course we wanted to do that as children, but our parents didn’t allow it.  We all had one choice for an extracurricular, and the rest of the summer was dedicated to play, imagination, and fun.  None of us are worse for the wear because of it.  This is what I want for my children, while I do understand the importance of a balanced life with some extracurriculars, I think down time is just as important.

 

Holiday traditions part one June 24, 2008

Fourth of July

Traditions are so important for families, and children love the routine and rhythm associated with them.  It is important to me to provide my children with special memories that will stay with them through their whole lives.  We are especially lucky on July 4th, because behind our house a farm family has their own fireworks show that rivals the professional one done by our town, and near by big city.  So all we need to do is saunter out onto the deck and watch an amazing show.  We are blessed with good family and friends close by, and this year East Coast grandparents will be joining us.

The menu:

grilled chicken, cod, and vegetables

blueberry-strawberry rustic tart

red, white, and blue jello shapes

berry salad with fresh whipped cream

field greens with pear, caramelizedwalnuts, blue cheese, with balsamic vinaigrette

We will be making fourth of July frames to put memorable pictures, and we will make place mats for our guest using plain white place mats, and fabric pens.

Deceptively Delicious Review June 24, 2008

I was recently given a copy of the cookbook Deceptively Delicious by Jessica Seinfeld.  Before I even start my review I want to post a big disclaimer: In my home, we all eat vegetables and fruits, and I feel it is important for our children to be exposed to them.  While I won’t force them to eat, I do have a rule that we must try a bite.  At the same time, I have good friends who feel the same way, and each day is a battle to get their children to eat vegetables aside from carrots and corn, and those good friends worry about the lack of nutrients in their diet, and don’t want to rely on vitamins alone.

So when I received the book, I had a moment where I thought:  What is the point of hiding vegetables and fruits when kids should eat them anyways?  I was really suspicious.  After reading it cover to cover, I feel differently.  The recipes are really great for the most part, and even if your kids do love their veggies, adding extra ones only increases the nutritional content.  I love how the book let’s you know what each hidden vegetables nutritional makeup is.  I never knew cauliflower was so nutritious. 

The purees she has you make are easy to do, you can do them once a month and freeze them as needed and if you have made baby food it is very similar.  I really love the idea, and the foods are very family friendly.  My favorites that I have made so far are the delicious oatmeal, rice balls, ice cream sandwiches, and carrot cake muffins. 

I think this book is a great addition to your cookbook collection if you like to cook, try knew things, and make nutritious meals for your family.

 

Babyfood making June 22, 2008

I am curious as to how many momma’s out there make their own babyfood, and why they do.  Also those who don’t the reason why as well.  The economy as it is I can see that more people will get into this.  I just went out and got a food mill & storage containers today. I would only use organic produce. 

My family and I are making and canning applesauce this fall, we like it on the chunky side, but I thought I would also make some that is really blended for the babies.  Being a part time WAHM, I have the time to do this, and I know it will make me feel good doing it.  Having said that, it is always a personal decision for each parent to make. 

Cloth diapering June 22, 2008

There are so many options out there.  I am wondering if it is cheaper to learn to sew them, I love the AIO’s with the cute prints, especially the embroidered ones, but they are pricey. I have 5 so far, and only use them when we are staying at home.

So how hard is it to sew these?  Which patterns would you use?  I have begun researching different patterns.  I am thinking of getting a bunch of different ones sewing them, testing them on the babies and reviewing them so other momma’s know the pro’s and cons of each one.  What about fabrics?  Where are the best places to buy diaper fabrics?

 I also think the wool soakers are adorable!  So momma’s of the world, how much does it really cost you to cloth diaper your little ones?  We are looking for a knowledgable momma(s) to tell us the real deal…..

Trying to be a “green” Momma June 9, 2008

Trying to be green, and not because it is trendy.  Once you become a momma, and you learn about what all these pesticides, hormones, antibiotics etc. can do to you & your family it becomes more of a how can you not do everything in your power to make the switch. 

Plus I want to leave my children with less environmental damage as well.  The downside is how expensive it can be to feed your family organic, & purchase safe cleaning products I can’t believe how quickly it adds up.  With our fuel crisis in this country, and the skyrocketing cost of groceries it can be a real strain on the budget.  Right now I am nursing, and even though it is less costly than formula, I still have to eat as well as possible.

I am currently writing an book on saving money on all these things, using my own experience & trial by error.  I will share it as soon as I am done.  I feel that there is a major shift going on in our country right now, a back to basics time, and I don’t know how many of us are truly prepared for what that entails. 

Hello there June 9, 2008

This is West Coast Momma, the first topic I am eager to talk about is baby wearing.  Both of us Momma’s are trying out different carriers, I am using a pouch sling.  I also constructed a second one using a funky old t-shirt I had.  I have been wearing my little pixie since she was born, and still do 15 months later.  I am eager to try other ones for my next little one.  There are such cute fabrics to choose from, I am thinking of testing out a Mei Tei.

 Here are some fun facts about baby wearing that you can read about at Dr. Sear’s wonderful and informative site.  It has made it easy from me to get things around the house done, work in my home office, while also bonding & responding to Pixie.  I especially like the research how cultures that wear their babies don’t have colic.  Pixie rarely cried and I know it is because I was able to respond to her easily when she needed something.  Being a novice sewer I may have to try my hand at making some baby carriers.  Stay tuned…..

 

Greetings and Salutations June 8, 2008

 East Coast Momma here! So this is the Mommacafe blog.  With the help of West Coast Momma we will share with you everything to do with being a Momma, and occasionally a Daddy when our guest posters East & West Coast Poppa will give a male perspective.  We don’t always see eye to eye, but that is the beauty of motherhood, each individual knows what is best for their child.

What I am into right now: baby carriers (post to come), nursing & nursing gear, bonding with baby, adorable baby clothes, diapering options, vitamins, getting into shape after baby, and reading everything I can about parenting.